I will build a palace, make you happier than ever. It's just around the corner between lavender and heaven I'll be there, singing the song you'll never hear. Until you're here, singing 'til you're out of tears. I'll be there, I'll be there.
-Lavender and Heaven by Iris
I hate looking for things. Zero patience given. I call out to one my kids if they have seen or touched something. Moved it. Ate it. Left it outside. Basically, I am trying to engage them into looking for something I do not want to take the time to find myself.
Caleb would be always game to find something for me. The other times, he was game to hide something I was using. I am easily distracted and so I was an easy target. As in turning away to get something out of the fridge and he would take away the coffee cup, or cereal bowl, or my bowl of ice cream. And I would not notice for a bit because I was so engaged into talking with him. Then I would notice my cup of coffee was missing or my bowl of whatever and I would call out in distress, and he would be giggling his head off. “Caleb!”
And now with him gone. Things that have up and dissapeared on me over the years have been turning up. An old harmonica in a red leather case just showed up suddenly, it had gone missing 4 years prior. So now, if I can’t find something I will whisper out “All right Caleb…where is it?” And then I will walk right toward the object.
Recently a handle from an end table that I was working on turned up. It had been missing for about a year and a half. I was quite frustrated when I misplaced it. They were antique and I was not sure I could buy another.
I had started on 1 end table but held off to start on the other end table. Holding out hope the handle would be found.
It has been sitting, unpainted, and missing one handle for a year and a half.
And I had given up hope in finding it.
On one of our rare sunny days here. I was out watering my plants. Walking about with the watering hose dousing my plants as I went. As I watered one of my potted lavendar, something caught my eye. “What is that?” I thought to myself. But I stepped away and kept watering the other plants. Then I stopped in place, turned around and looked closer ” No way..” I thought to myself as I quickly bent to retrieve the item.
And there, just resting next to the lavender, above the dirt. Sat my handle to my end table. Why have I not noticed this before? All summer long I water the potted plants along my walk way. And as I flipped and turned the found object in my hand, inspecting it. I smiled.
I love lavender so much. And Caleb did as well. I am not going to question this blessing, I am going to invite it in fully.
Thank you, Caleb.