Tragic Tulip

Struggling undone Tulip 2019-hummingbird

A year ago, I started painting this tulip. One leaf in, a couple of petals, and I began to feel frustrated. Nothing was going right. It looked, tragic. I could not bare with the failure of my art. So, I picked it up, and tossed it into the corner of my room. literally. I stewed about it for about 3o minutes. And forgot about it.

Lately, I have been using acrylic pens. Drawing flowers, and a lot of them. Spring and Summer had me outside, landscaping and planting. I thoroughly enjoyed it! With the season now changing to more rain, and the projects outside winding down. I am finding myself inside, drawing and practicing flowers on canvas and paper.

The pens give me more freedom then with the paint brush. And I get this childish joy of coloring. I have always enjoyed coloring. Finding ways to shade and color images with my box of crayons (most half-broken) was like, breathing life into a colorless picture. Ah yes, that was a good time. Forget parties with nameless faces, give me a coloring book, and I was home.

Introvert much?

What was I talking about? Oh yes, my tragic tulip. While I was digging round for a sketch pad to doodle in. I spied this art between the clutter of odds and ends. And suddenly, it did not seem SO tragic. I tilt my head slight, like a dog sniffing out a treat. And then I snatched it up and started up on it once more. This time with my acrylic pens.

I worked on it for an hour or so. My fingertips vibrant colors of orange and yellows, and a smudge of green somewhere along my right thumb. I was pretty happy with how it was turning out, but most importantly, I felt supremely happy within myself.

For a time I was blissfully unaware of the dishes in the sink. Laundry. And my growling tummy. And when I held it up for inspection, though it was not THAT great, I liked it. Art is my happy space. Being plugged into creativity helps me to thrive at life. At being, me.

I suppose with the rush of the day to days, and the constant strain of time management, and pleasing a cranky boss. It is easy to forget your own joys. But, you need that paycheck, so off you go.

This hamster wheel deal, had me burned out and exhausted.

I had no idea when I chucked this tragedy into the dark corner of my room, that a year later, it would help me remember what I was missing out on.

ME.

And no one chucks me into a corner.

*cue music*

“And I hope, you had the time of your life…..” Runs and jumps into Patrick Swayze’s uplifted arms…Pose in air like a bird in flight….Hold. Hold….YES!

Sorry, couldn’t help myself….

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