Tag: Death
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FEEL
I once had a dream. Before I was dating the man I am now married to. The dream seemed to be of a warning, but a warning I was unsure of. I dreamed, this man, was on his back. His daughter (his daughter that I had not met yet) was staring down at him. The […]
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Dance
It has almost been 3 months since my son’s passing. Still processing. I find myself analyzing myself a lot. Wondering if I am doing it correctly. As in, am I sad enough? I should be more sad, I should be curled up on the couch or in my bed. Not eating. Not wanting to participate […]
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Grief
Grief is a Carnival you never want to enter. Its sign, flickering afar, with its dark, lonely, depressing cadence. Catching your eye every now and then as you journey through, skirting its borders. It fills you with fear. Not excitement. Not in mysterious wonder. Your belly will not fill with cotton candy joy as you […]
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Hard Things
There has been a mistake, that’s all. And he will be coming back through my door again. With that sideways grin of his. A soft “hey..” And he will first head to the kitchen, as he often did. Then come sit down on the floor next to me, play with his favorite dog, Josie. I […]
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KICK
No one can walk you through loss. No one can take your hand and say “walk with me..” and you comply and follow blindly. Floating through as an apparition, a thin hand passing over velvet. No. That is not the way to travel through grief. Grief comes at you like a sniper shot. A bullet […]